Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts

Dark days and nights...



As you may have noticed, I have been  blogging a lot less recently and that is partly due to the change in seasons (winter is not a blogger's best friend) and partly because I have been feeling more than a little overwhelmed recently. There's been nothing specific that has triggered this, it's just that life seems to have sped up whilst my energy levels have dropped. Quite frankly I haven't had the energy to keep up with the relentless process of photograph, write, promote, repeat and blogging has suffered as a result. Last night, this all came to a head (cue me bursting into tears) so Mark and I decided to go for a walk and spent about an hour and a half wandering around Cheltenham, making plans and talking through everything, which despite everything was actually really nice. 

In order to try and get a handle on everything again, we decided to draw up an evening schedule for in the week in order to allow time together going for walks and exploring the lovely place we live in and also some 'self care' time (Rosie's post on this is brilliant and really struck a chord with me) which could be anything from reading, blogging or even having a bath. I think I have always been torn between missing out on things and wanting to make the most of any free time we have but at what cost? I have been feeling very overwhelmed for a long time and I was physically and emotionally exhausted last night but I slept through the night for the first time in a long time. Isn't it amazing what a bit of fresh air and a good chat can do?

I don't know quite what this post is trying to say really, I guess I just wanted to get some of the muddled thoughts out of my head onto the page. Life is never easy but it has been harder than usual recently so please do bear with me whilst I get my head back on track... I would also love to hear about anything that has helped you when you have been feeling anxious or stressed too, please do share!
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Burgundy jeans and a striped tee...

I have always found that clothes are the best indicator of my mood, whether that is bright and exuberant or more restrained. So much of our confidence is tied up with how we look and blogging has made me a much more confident person (just look how far I have come since one of my first outfit posts!) but recently I have been feeling all kinds of rubbish. I realise that most people won't want to know about my self esteem issues but I have always been honest about the lows on this blog as unfortunately life isn't always sunshine and flowers! Since starting my job last April, I have put on a lot of weight and much to my dismay, some clothes are now off limits as they are too small. As a result of this, I have been quite self conscious of my problem areas (hello hips and torso!) and so have been looking for ways to disguise them. I am working to lose my weight gain, replacing crisps and cake with  salads and more exercise *sob* but as anyone who has lost weight knows, it can be a slow process! Despite all of the above (!) I really love this outfit and am looking forward to recreating it when I want some cosy layers...

TL;DR- I put on weight which is bad because I can't fit into some of my clothes and my self esteem suffered as a result...

Top: Laura Ashley c/o Matilda, t-shirt (underneath): Mango, jeans: Miss Selfridge, boots: c/o Spartoo
 I think this striped tee/jumper is supposed to end on your hips but as I am not particularly tall, it has ended up looking more like a tunic on me! I really loved pairing the navy top with my burgundy jeans and these jeans felt a lot more dressy than my usual dark denim. I imagine the top would work with some jazzy shorts in the summer too, watch this space...
  

I also love the fact that the jumper is a nice thin layer so you don't end up looking too bulky when you are all wrapped up to go outside or cause you to boil alive when you reach work and find that someone has turned the heating up too far. I would usually avoid such a boxy shape but I think with skinny jeans it works quite nicely...


This nail varnish is part of the rather wonderful Nails Inc set that I picked up in TK Maxx recently (along with this Rouge Noir inspired shade) and is a gorgeous pinky burgundy colour. It is the little details that make all the difference and I always feel much more pulled together when I paint my nails. I have also been trying to appreciate the little things in life; there's nothing nicer than scented candles or fresh flowers

How do you stay upbeat? What makes you feel more confident?